Ths show is over

Our Christmas shows are over, and so are our exams. I had forgotten what exams were like, having not partaken in any since high school. Comedian school has weird exams, like a Creativity exam. In said exam I had to write 'thank you for the knowledge of creativity techniques you're instilled upon me, don't be sad if my answers are wrong because I don't know which names are which techniques. I can and do use them all'.

I think I kicked ass in my 'joke' exam, which I am happy about. I ended up passing my French exam, thank God! I have improv left, and a meeting with the director.

The shows were quite hard. Our best comedian got mono and only did half the shows, and our energy was not as it could have been. I do not have the acting chops to deliver my number as it should be. It was very hard.

Christmas vacation then Disney world on the horizon. More debt to come. Please God let me be talented enough to make lots of money, because I am the only breadwinner for the family.

I fell on my face but I'm not bleeding

So yesterday I had a Friday. We're working on our numbers for the show. I don't know what happened but I could not have cared less. Nothing was coming out. Not one line! My friend had to feed me almost every single one.

It was like the dress rehearsals for our ballet shows where stuff went so wrong that we thought things would never work.

I came away from it with a sort of certainty that it wouldn't ever happen again. I'm going to work on my text today, and it will be the final version (I have decided) and I will learn it and know it by heart this Monday for my individual meeting. There's no other option.

You know what else I have to do this week? I have to write a funny song and perform it in front of people. I have to make up a game. A board game. That we can play. This is a group thing too so we have to all get together and not only make it great but do the arts and crafts that goes with it.

Soon I have to do a 4 minute spoof on a television show which will be SO FUN! Except for:

We have our show on the 11th and 12th of December. I need to get passports in order. Make sure I pay bills. Go to my parent-teacher meetings. Keep money aside for Disney World (see how I shouldn't be complaining. I get to bring my kids to DISNEY WORLD! HOW COOL IS THAT????). I have to shift bank accounts around and cancel some stuff and do paperwork at my old job. I have to be a mother and take care of my kids because they're my entire reason for being and wanting to get better and working my ass off. I need to find time to exercise because I feel horrible. I need to cook all the time to have healthy stuff to eat. I need to keep my eyes and ears open for projects and I also need to take care of the house but I do some everyday and it's not enough and just the fact that my husband thinks that should be my priority above all else (that and making him food) is enough to make me not wanna make it a priority.

And thank god my sister Sarah comes over to help, or I would never see her and she's my best friend. I don't see my sister Karine at all (we both have no time) and I no longer have any friends. I don't even get to hang out with my parents and when I do all I do is complain, I feel. Yes, home is where you can say what's on your mind or vent, but why the hell would they want to see me or my family if I can't be okay for 2 seconds?

I need to be impressive in school if I ever want to work. It's got to be number 2 behind my kids, and sometimes number 1, 'cause that's who I am doing it for.

I don't think I'll be doing another English show before Christmas... But maybe I can finish my novel? Haha!

Ambition, baby!

Clearly I am insane, as already demonstrated in my real life and all my posts. Even my mother tends to reinforce my point, since she talks to me about stuff like my having the wrong brush for my kids hair... I definitely get it from somewhere.

Anyway, I did have to drop Nano. Although a small part of me wonders how I can't go to school, do outside projects, exercise, eat right, pay bills, be super creative, put on a show and groom and look great all at the same time. I mean, I'm pretty sure my mother could do it. Bitch.

Ok, that was harsh. Sorry mommy!

Anyway, in that life list of stuff I nee to be doing right now, I am doing exactly 1. 2, if you count my grooming (I'm at strict minimum grooming, I wash, but there's no pampering involved).

I keep saying the only way to have the freedom to do what you need to do and the possibility of maybe doing what you want to, you have to be obscenely rich. So that's just another thing on the list of things to put off.

And stuff keeps getting added on to my to-do list without my say-so. My fellow students and I, all adults, have to go talk to the director about a student who's making things difficult for the group. That'll be fun.

Nanowrimo has kicked off!

And yes, I'm right in the middle of it. Since we don't have to create new numbers every Friday and some of the teachers are slacking on homework, I am using my breaks to write my new book.

I'm not saying I'm going to finish it or that I wouldn't drop it as the first sign of trouble, but right now I need this. I need to train myself to write all the time. And if I'm already sitting down writing, I can always procrastinate by either working on my novel or by working on my homework. It's the perfect fit.

I'm going to write all night Wednesday at a second cup downtown with other wrimos. It'll be great since I'm usually at home trying to write all night (Thursday is an insane day at school)...

I'm about 4 thousand words in, which translates to 15 pages. I find that pretty good, since I've only had two days to work on this. Can I bust 10 thousand words at the write in? Enquiring minds want to know!

On another note, I think I'm going to write a monologue about listening to song lyrics. I don't get it. If one more couple chooses 'every breath you take' as a romantic song to have at your wedding I'm going to hurl.

Guess what I'm supposed to be doing?

How do I work in a group?

My favorite class should be exported into classrooms and offices everywhere. Creativity class blows my mind. If you want a taste, buy the book 'Thinkertoys' and you will start to get it. There are so many ways to get your creative juices flowing. Seemingly endless ways to find new ideas.

I can't stop gushing about it!

So why do I have trouble doing the homework? I feel like the class has given me a safety net. I know what to do if I need help to write. There seems to always be a way to get out of a funk. And just when you learn one way, another way reveals itself. So that's why I can't analise what I do wrong when, with these tools, I should be all good.

Today I figure out how I work in a group. But that's all relative. Everything is relative, and we have techniques to get things working for any group too. Am I just being lazy? Or have a really absorbed what I am supposed to have to?

Quick, be productive-

Now that's funny! There's nothing that leads less to being productive than having to do so quickly, which is basically what I'm being asked to be all week.

Not only do I have to be productive, but I have to be creative too. Now, I'm a pretty creative person, but pulling jokes out of my ass for joke class, or delving into my psyche for creativity, or birthing a number for next Friday is not something I can do as easily as I make my bed and wash the dishes. And just to clarify, I basically never do either of those things.

I'm at school, getting ready to start trying to do my homework. I've been here for 3 hours talking and fucking around. And not the fun fucking around, the fucking around that means doing stupid things fully dressed. Boo!

Alright, so if I start at 2, by the time it's 5 I might have some stuff done. One, two, three... Who wants to take a break?

First Friday over

We have these things called Fridays. I know what you're going to say: Annie, I'm pretty sure we all have those. Good! I like a quick audience. I'm not talking about the day of the week, although the Fridays I'm talking about do end up falling on a Friday (go figure). I'm talking about comedy!school and our creation class.

We've been sitting pretty in a sort of comedy laboratory for the first 4 weeks of school, trying numbers out on our class, really whatever we wanted. I am not the best at trying out characters, and I cannot hold an accent or a speech pattern for 1 minute, let alone 5. That's basically what I tried out, with varying degrees of success (still can't hold a speech pattern or accent).

Our first Friday just ended and the 11 of us were quite good, if I do say so myself. I was proud that although we all, with nerves, went over our 5 minutes, every one of us knew our text and every one of us was inventive. There are no weak links in our class. I take this as a good thing, because I want everyone to succeed and to push each other to be better. That said, there is rarely room for everyone to succeed it seems, so it does make me sad.

I've got to feed three kids and my overgrown adolescent husband, I need to be one of those people who succeed. I need to transcend. I probably need to be a man... Ok, so I don't, but if I had a dick it would be a lot easier to succeed. How come my monologues go over better when a guy does them, even when they don't even have good comedic timing? Actually, I don't mind being a writer, as long as I get to live doing something I love.

Back to now: joke writing is freaking hard. We have a class that teaches us all the types of jokes, which we usually write into a monologue. In that class, we have to pluck them out of thin air with no topic, set up or text, hope they're original and correct and FUNNY. That class will be my downfall. Seriously.

On another note, I need my hair done badly. I used to laugh at people that went to the hairdresser, now I don't want to get laughs because my hair is ridiculous. Especially if my hair is funnier than the jokes I'm doing which, if it were the case, kill me now.